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[11132] I hate myself

I hate myself so much for still loving my ex after all this time that instead of putting a gun to my head to kill myself, I am using food to do it slowly. I\'ve gained almost 100 lbs in 5 years. This keeps men from being attracted to me and allows me to wallow in self-loathing. I decided today that I really don\'t want to do this any more, and that maybe, just maybe, I can learn to like myself all over.

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