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Sent to a friend i know that this might not make much sense but i get just so werided and bummed out by talking about it, when i was about 12 years old i was at my dads for the weekend and i was watching my siblings my 2 sisters and my 1 brother, before my dad left to work he gave me and the older sister specific instructions not to allow the younger sister and brother into his room, where his guns were kept, soon after we were all sitting in the kids bedroom listening to forbidden rock music, my youngest sister left to get something to drink, she took a while and when i was just fixing to check on her, she walks in with a gun 9mm ??? pointing it at all of us, laughing away, i rushed for the gun, i knew the proabability of her taking the saftey switch off, for my father had always had it on, on all his guns. we put the gun back exactly where she said that she got it, and we waited. we waited for my father to come home, i should of ran, i think it would of been better if i went in the woods and been mauled by a moutain lion but i waited thinking he wouldnt know what had happened. he came home, and we didnt tell him about it, maybe we should of. he realized what had happened and he told us we would all be spanked. i hated more than anythings his spanking they were beyond ackward, we would pray before, after and he would sometimes cry, as he brought the inch and a half thick board on our little asses and besides the fact that i had hit puberty too, it was just werid. i was the last to go, my closest sister to me walked out of the room crying her eyes out, telling me it wasnt right, that he shouldnt do this. it wasnt right or fair, my stupid sense of what was right and wrong got the best of me, along with being the older protective and headstrong sister, after she left and before he could call my name, i ran in there telling him i am not going to get spanked, and that this is wrong. we fell into this sort of fight trying to free each others hands, him being trained in karate, and taller, while i was a12 years old an over weight, he easily got the advantage, i know i started the fight but i was 12 and he was 35 and i never was able to get a punch in, but as soon as he got the chance he put a choke hold on. i didnt realize what was going on, at first i thought that he was waiting until i calmed down, i immediatly let go of my hands and stopped kicking. but he wasnt stopping and i was trying to get air, my eyes felt as if they were going to pop out, the sides of my sight were going dark and all i could do was look at the window in the room, i tried to scream, i tried to reach behind me, and claw on him, i tried to get up, but we were both on our knees, suddenly i saw a flash of red, i looked at the ugle green carpet in the room and noticed that it was blood, i felt something warm on my chin, i touched it, there was blood and not just a little, enough to fill up one cupped hand, i started to panic, i turned to god, i didnt even ask or pray for my father to stop i prayed for my soul, i prayed to god to forgive the sine that i have committed, my hands stopped throwing around and the room was getting dark, then he stopped he let go. after him almost killing his daughter, he still spanked me, i vow somekind of revenge, i love him, he raised me, he clothed and fed me and sometimes i knew he truley loved me, but there's times when he is laying down asleep, or his back is turned that i wished i had a knife, or a gun, i dont know if i will do anything. i dont know.......Rating:1.00
Comments
- thats terrible, your father shouldnt have put you through that... He could have killed you
